We care for our grandkids and need help now
Dear Doris,
We are grandparent caregivers (kindship caregivers) for two toddlers. My husband had open heart surgery, and we need to get to the doctor (he won't go without me due to anxiety/panic) but we don't have a sitter for our babies. One is special needs ADHD/ODD, so we need advice.
Please help
Virginia
Dear Virginia,
Toddlers sure can be exhausting, and on top of that you are immersed in caregiving for your husband. My heart goes out to you. There are a few resources that might help.
First, there are many wonderful supports through the Kinship Navigator (https://www.nysnavigator.org/).
While they don’t provide childcare services, they do have local case managers that can help you find resources and navigate the system.
Also, NYSCRC has a Voucher Program that can help you pay for childcare, and because you have two children, you may be eligible for up to $900. You can find that information at https://www.nyscrc.org/help-paying-for-respite-care or you can call our Voucher Program Coordinator, Rebecca at 585-287-6391. She will be happy to walk you through the process.
I understand that you are struggling to find care. Some caregivers say that it is much easier when they can pay a provider. That is where the Voucher Program can help. You can hire whomever you choose and pay whatever rate you like. The only restrictions are: 1) If you are currently receiving respite support from any other program, you are not eligible for the voucher; 2) You can't hire someone who lives in the household with you and the kids.
Finally, NYSCRC has launched the Respite Registry, a new database for family caregivers to find independent providers, agencies, and volunteer respite programs across NYS. This may be a resource for you in tandem with the respite voucher. This service is specifically searchable by needs and location. You can find the Respite Registry at https://respite.nyscrc.org/
I have been a kinship grandparent myself. What I do know is that having grandchildren in your care means that there are difficult circumstances that have brought them to you, so I assume you are managing a challenging family situation on top of everything else. Please take care of your own mental health. You are experiencing an unbelievable amount of pressure. I would suggest that you seek out some kind of counseling or support for yourself. When we are immersed in this kind of situation, we, as caregivers, often put ourselves last. You must take care of yourself if you want to continue to provide the steadfast care that you so faithfully do. Be gentle with yourself; you are doing great!
Best,
Doris